Pancake Day!

Like millions across the UK, Mrs Doombreed and I marked pancake day today. Despite my several years here, this was the first time I'd made pancakes for She Who Is The Centre Of My World, and I was pleased with the reception.

Thus, for posterity and because it took me a while converting from real measurements to those strange American ones, here is the recipe:

1/2 cup all-purpose flour, sifted
pinch of salt
2 eggs
A little more than 3/4 cup milk, mixed with 1/3 cup water
2 tbsp melted butter

1: Sift the flour and salt into a bowl. Make a well in the centre and break the eggs into it. Whisk flour and eggs together.

2: Gradually add the milk/water mixture whilst whisking. When all the liquid has been added, scrape the bowl to ensure everything is mixed. Mixture should be the consistency of thin cream. Add the melted butter and whisk together.

3: Heat frying pan to medium-hot, and grease with whatever you use (butter works, but I found non-stick spray did just as well). Our frying pan is 10" across, smaller pans will require next mixture. Drop one ladlefull (about 3 1/2 tbsps) of the batter into the centre of the pan, swirling the pan to ensure the batter covers evenly.

4: Cook until the underside goes golden-brown (no more than two or three minutes) and then flip over by tossing the pancake in the air and catching it in the pan.

5: Scrape pancake off of ceiling, throw in garbage, and go back to step 3, this time remembering to toss with less force.

6: Scrape pancake off of floor, throw in garbage, and go back to step 3, remembering to toss more accurately.

7: Frantically beat out flames, scrape pancake off of burner, run to deactivate smoke alarm, open windows and doors to vent smoke, and go back to step 3, deciding to use a spatula to turn pancake instead of tossing it.

8: Second side of pancake will not need as long as first, When it, too, is golden-brown (actually, it's a kind of dark yellow with yellow-brown spots, but cookery books always say "golden brown'), slide out onto plate and move to decoration.


Pancakes can be eaten just about any way you choose. Sprinkle with confectioners sugar, splash on some lemon juice, throw some ice cream on, chuck on a handful of just about any type of fruit, chocolate syrup, jam, nuts, cream, bacon, golden or maple syrup, whatever (and all of the above for a seriously nauseating experience). My favourite is:

Doombreed's Big Boy Special

Wrap your pancake around a banana (of course it's peeled, silly boy) and place on a plate. Drizzle with golden syrup (or maple syrup if golden is not available) and decorate with whipped cream. You now have a phallic dessert which would make Freud choke on his cigar.



Digital Video Recorder. TiVo is the brand name, but may other brands are available. And it is, without a doubt, the best thing ever. We've had DVR on our cable for a while now, and, like DVD and VCR before it, I don't know how we ever lived without it.

We can rewind and pause live TV. We can record two different channels at once - and watch something we've already recorded. We can set it to record every episode of any series (oh yes, Stargate SG:1 is being recorded).

This got me thinking about two things. The first is that, in essence, a DVR is really just a hard-drive connected to your TV, so the technology has been available for a couple of decades now. I wonder why it took so long to think of it. I mean, it seems so bloody obvious when you think of it, yet that is the beauty of hindsight.

The second thing is this: I wonder what the next big thing in home entertainment will be?

I guess being able to spot it would make me a rich man.

Fluorescent discs were supposed to be an up-and-coming thing a few years back. Everything that makes a DVD cool but with - well, at last estimate I heard - twenty times the capacity. Imagine having every episode of your favourite TV series on one disc. Yep, you don't even have to expend energy getting up to change discs. Wow. Of course, that's not that big a deal, because you can get DVD multi-changers even now.

But imagine a fluorescent disc multi-changer. Build a toilet into your armchair, drop a fridge next to it, and you'd never have to move again.

Of course, DVR ain't done yet. Bigger hard drives, more channels at once, that kind of thing. But I wonder how long before DVR goes the way of the VCR, which is to say that almost everyone has one, but we use them less and less.

Interesting that it took both DVD and DVR to truly take over for VHS. Shame it kinda preempted DVD-R and DVD-RW as the next great way to record stuff.

(And I wonder if there's an award for most acronyms in one blog entry).

I'm going to make a prediction. If DVRs have a shortcoming, it's that fact that you can only deal with the TV/cable/satellite transmissions it's hooked up to. In the future, possibly the near future, the DVR and the home computer will come closer, maybe even meld together. Ports to connect your digital still and video camera and download the contents. Card slots for storage cards for transferring programmes and saving them. Maybe the ability to download videos to your iPod video player or other portable device.

Maybe one day you'll be able to take video on your camera, watch the video on your television, and then email it to your mother all from the same set-top box.

Write that down, make it, patent it and make a fortune. And don't forget to chuck some cash in the way of your ole pal Doombreed.

Of course, people have been predicting the ultimate all-in-one entertainment centre for a while now, so don't count on me being right this time. Any money you invest is entirely at your own risk.


Too much time on my hands...


Movie Weekend

Movies we rented this weekend:

Lord of War

Good movie, food for thought. Nicholas Cage at his best.

Doombreed Rating: ****1/2


Pretty much everything you'd expect. Gore, guns, The Rock. And the BFG. So it's all basically an advert for Doom 3, so what?

Doombeed Rating: ****

Christmas With The Kranks

Okay, I hated how the book ended, so what possessed me to watch the film? Funny, in places, but the moral is that sanctimonious fuckheads are always right.

Doombreed Rating: **


Not just the food service industry, this is a film for anyone who has worked in any job that involves customer service. A guy film from all angles. Brilliant.

Doombreed Rating: ****1/2

7 Seconds

Good movie that seemed to slip unnoticed through the cinemas. Enough intrigue to keep me interested, enough action to keep it exciting, enough drama to prevent bulletfest overload.

Doombreed Rating: ****

Dark Water

Not quite as gripping as the trailers made it out to be. Over a little too fast and a little too easily for me.

Doombreed Rating: ***1/2

The Interpreter

Intrigue set around the UN. I didn't see it because of the migraine and all, but Mrs Doombreed liked it.

Mrs Doombreed Rating: ****1/2

Ouch Night

Okay, so another migraine took me out of the running last night. What a doozy. I hope I can figure out what is causing these and stop doing whatever it is.


Friday Rodent Blogging

A historic moment in the rearing of a young gerbil. Baby's first bite. Yes, that's my hand, that's my ring finger she's attacking. And thanks to Mrs Doombreed's excellent timing, I can share this Kodak moment with the world.

*sniffles* I swore I wouldn't cry...


I wonder if Florence is a virgin?

Well, I just recieved what may be the strangest news in the history of the world. They've made The Magic Roundabout into a movie.

I understand that, in the UK, it retains its title, but over here in the US, having never been exposed to the LSD trip-by-proxy that is the adventures (if that's the right word for it) of Dougal the mop-dog, Florence the human, Brian the fast snail, Ermintrude the matronly cow, Dylan the spaced-out hippy rabbit, and Zebedee the speed-freak spring-legged boing-a-tron, have to put up with it being called "Doogal". They'll even, I understand, have different actors playing the parts (but Zebedee better get in his famous last line, or there'll be trouble from this fan...).

I really, really can't wait. I wonder how many, if any, of the drug references have been left in.

BTW, 20 points to anyone who can spot the source of this entry's title.

Time for bed, said Zebedee.


Has nobody shot the BNP yet?

Yeah, okay, I'm all for freedom of speech. I'm right behind the right to believe any crap you want. And, yes, I'm bang alongside the right to be a complete tosspot if you are such a turdbag that doing so is the only way to wring any sense and purpose from your miserable, pathetic existence.

Having said that, the news that the BNP "
said on Wednesday it would distribute leaflets showing a cartoon of the Prophet Mohammad" is downright annoying. No, not that they're doing it, that typical of their stupidity, but that they were so all-fired-up, kids-on-Christmas-eve, cum-in-their-pants excited about it that they had to announce they were going to do it rather than just going ahead and - well - doing it. It's pathetic. It conjures up an image of a kid standing on a wall yelling for his friends to watch before he can jump off, while secretly hoping someone'll stop him.

Yes, kiddiewinks, that's why the BNP has no seats in the Commons. Because they're pathetic.

The title of this piece is, in retrospect, a bit silly. They are not worth the bullets.


The Forge

The Forge is an excellent free programme used to draw up army lists for various table-top wargames. I know that several readers will be interested in this, which is why I posted it.

Ain't I nice to you?

The programme itself is pretty good, if a little confusing at first. I use it to draw up lists for my Praetorian 40k army* and I've yet to have any compatibility problems with the new IG codex.

Run, go try it**.

*the painting of my IG Praetorian army is, alas, nowhere near as speedy, remaining - after several years - mostly unpainted. It does, of course, go without saying that those items which are painted are superbly done, which is what is taking the time. And it you believe that, you'll believe anything.

**unless, of course, you're not into 40k or any other Wargame, in which case, go play with this.


Today's Sign Of The Impending Apocalypse

The company that designed Milton Keynes has been contracted to rebuild a war-ravaged Iraqi holy city.

You cannot make this shit up.

Do the Iraqis even know how to use a roundabout?


Dissent and the patriot

One of the most amusing of American political tactics is defining opposition to anything the government says or does as unpatriotic - even treasonous.

Since 9/11 - and to a certain extent, before - anyone who doesn't wholeheartedly support the current administration in any detail is often portrayed as being somehow unAmerican.
It is hard, for me, to understand how anyone can fall for this approach, for two reasons.

The first reason is purely a matter of historical merit. The very basis for American society, the origin of the entire nation, is rebellion. It is the belief that authority should be questioned, the total rejection of the notion of infallible government, that defines the creation of the United States of America. That any person - no matter their station or situation - has the right to question and to challenge the government was one of the driving forces behind the USA's struggle for independence.

So central is the concept that it forms the basis for the Declaration of Independence of the Thirteen Colonies:
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. --That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or abolish it[...]
It is part of the First amendment, which not only protects free speech, but also the right of the people to petition the government for "a redress of grievances."

The Constitution of the United States even begins with the declaration "We, the People," a hugely unusual statement for the time.
Even today, official documents and declarations issued by most governments - for example, declarations of war - draw upon the authority of the deity or deities that are culturally significant to the country concerned, and it is by drawing upon this divine right that most governments hold themselves to be beyond reproach.

In Britain, for example, such documents are always predicated upon the authority of the Crown, which derives, its traditionally held, from the Christian god. The official title of the Queen goes "Her Majesty, Elizabeth the Second, by the grace of God Queen of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland..." and it is held that Monarchs are "ordained by God."

The authority of the American government, however, derives entirely from the Constitution, and the authority of the Constitution derives entirely from the people. It seems completely impossible that any individual could be considered to be betraying his government by criticising it, when he, in a very real sense, is the government, especially when that government is founded upon the principles of individual freedom and liberty.

The second reason is cultural. In Britain, there never would, nor could, be any suggestion that patriotism could be defined as unconditional support of any one party or administration. Such a suggestion would be greeted with howls of derision. Which is not to say, of course, that some parties haven't tried it.

Patriotism is defined - in England - as loyalty to the Crown. Queen and Country. Okay, you can throw whatever god you want in there, too, if it'll make you happy.

Administrations come and go, Prime Ministers change, the Crown is eternal. Everyone from the military down to the Cub Scouts swear allegiance to the Queen, not to the government.

It is just one advantage of a constitutional monarchy, that the head of State and the head of the government are separate. One can disagree with the government - vocally and often - without ever compromising one's patriotism.

I dislike the current Labour government intensely. I think Tony Blair is a grinning twat who needs constant supervision in order that he not turn Britain into some Orwellian nightmare zone.

But call me unpatriotic for it and you'll have a fight on your hands.

I don't have to support my government in order to be patriotic. In fact, when the government is doing harm to the country, opposition is the only patriotic option.

It is, of course, for Americans to decide for themselves how they define patriotism. Is it loyalty to the constitution? To the founding principles of the country? To the institution of government? To the office of the president? To the actual president? To the party?

Whatever one chooses, blind obedience is never a good thing. Had the Founding Fathers practiced that brand of patriotism, there would be no USA.

A rose by any other name

So, the Americans renamed sauerkraut and hamburgers ("liberty cabbage" and "liberty steaks", respectively) because of WWI. At the same time, the English renamed German Shepherd dogs ("Alsatians"). WWII brought change to the frankfurter ("hot dog") because it, too, is German. The Cold War saw the Turkish change the name of Russian salad ("American salad"). The Americans did it with french fries and french toast ("freedom fries" and freedom toast" respectively) because they were (and still are, according to that metronome of freedom, fairness, impartiality, and journalistic excellence, Fox News) pissed off at the French.

Well, now it's the Iranians' turn. Pissed off at Danish cartoonists drawing pictures of Mohammed, which is, according to certain flavours of Islam, blasphemy, bakers across Tehran are refusing to sell danish pastries and are, instead, selling "Roses of the Prophet Mohammed".

Okay, so you can't draw Mohammed, but it's fine to prostitute his name for the purpose of selling bakery items. Gotcha.


Friday Rodent Blogging

We decided that our lives would be less enjoyable without at least one of these little critters running around, so we'd like you to meet Selene.

She is a gerbil and, at the moment, very tiny - that bowl she's sitting in is about three inches across. She's not bitten me (yet) and I'm working on hand-training her.

Expect many more weeks of cuteness.

Friday Rodent Blogging

March 2003 - Feb 2006


Winter Olympics

So, Britain's finally won a medal in the Winter Olympics.

Woo hoo.

Yeah, I don't care. I'm not even watching. The Winter Olympics is, in my opinion, the pointless bastard half-cousin to the Summer Olympics, which is pointless enough itself. At least with the Summer Olympics we can have the entertainment of watching the latest western Superman with his corporate sponsors and his billion-dollar training regime get whipped by some Kenyan who trains by running around his village for hours every day and who's country's total contribution was a kit and a 'plane fare.

The Winter Olympics are a rich country's sport. Poor countries can't afford to build the ski slopes and bobsled runs necessary to train and can't afford the equipment needed to compete, so you rarely get to see the crushing defeat of 6 Million Dollar Man at the hands of 6.99 Man.

Not only that, but - with the exception of the odd crash - the events are dull as can be.

The same loss of respect that came from the Summer Olympics allowing beach volleyball, came for the Winter Olympics in the snowboarding competitions. And there's so many of them, all of which involve some variation of going down a hill on an ironing board. All of which are completely boring.

Oh, and the Yanks are, to borrow a phrase I've never liked, mad for it. It's amazing. It's being hashed and rehashed on TV 24 hours a day. They're making a big deal about how this year's Team USA has more world champions than any previous team. Whether that's any previous US team or any team from any country is not clear, but it's being bandied about like crazy. Check this, there are twelve pages of US competitors. Three pages of British competitors, too. It makes me wonder what could happen if the money spent to send these teams to Italy were instead channeled into, say, cancer research.

Hell, I wish them, and the GBR team well, but frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.

Roll on June.


In Memoriam

We lost Imo today. He'd been ill for a few days, and the vet said he'd had a lung infection, an infected eye, and he found an abscess on the back of his head. We think that the illness, combined with the stress of being taken to the vets and being handled by a stranger, was simply too much for him.

Since I started this blog I've made many jokes at Imo's expense, talking about his evil nature or his plans for world domination, but, whilst it's true he hated me, he was an adorable ball of fur, and we'll miss him very much.


Happy Valentine's Day


(and if you don't know what that means, this post isn't for you)


Liquor Barn

I snapped this picture whilst travelling around yesterday. Yes, that's a big building. Yes, it says "Liquor Barn" on the front. Yes, it's an off-license. Yes, I love living here.


Final Destination 3

We went to see Final Destination 3 today.

If you've seen Final Destination and Final Destination 2 then there's nothing unusual for the third. If you liked the first two, you'll like the third. If you didn't like the first two, don't bother.

The principle is the same, some teens narrowly avoid an accident thanks to a "vision", and then spend the movie being hunted down by Death in the order that they would have died had they not avoided death via the vision, according to Death's plan.


This movie suffers from a bad moment almost at the outset. The accident, this time on a rollercoaster, is caused by one guy dropping his camcorder which gets lodged on the track below. However, after the vision, camcorder boy gets off of the ride. So, therefore, there should have been no camcorder boy on the ride, no dropped camcorder, no accident.


Which would, weirdly, have made for a better movie as it would have been a departure from the formulaic nature of sequels. The ride could have been completed without incident, which would have missed out on the same old "holy crap he/she was right all along" factor, which would have made the discovery of the whole "Death's plan" aspect all the more fun. We'd know what was going on, but we'd have to wait to find out how the characters are going to figure it out.

Instead, the movie has the accident, despite the cause being removed, and off we go again.

Oh, tiny twist, in an Omenesque piece of cinematic bullhonkery, each character's death is foretold in photographs taken before the ride.

Before the ride?

Yep. One is left with the impression that some other agency is acting to give our teen heroes a chance, the same agency that provides the initial vision. Alas, the movie fails to elaborate on this aspect.

The death scenes come across as more gore, less thought, than the first two installments, and the plot seems a little strained at times.

Worth a watch, just don't expect anything Earth-shatteringly outstanding. Possibly worth renting.

Doombreed rating: ***1/2


Yak Trax

We've had a bout of bad weather here the last week or so (see pic) and I've once again seen the wisdom of buying a decent set of ice walkers.

Around this time last year, Mrs Doombreed and I invested in a set of Yak Trax each, and they're about the best purchase we've ever made.

What's astounding is that they were significantly cheaper than most others available, and yet they're amazing. They simply stretch over the sole of your shoe and provide excellent traction over the smoothest sheet of ice.

Don't go sprinting in them, of course, but normal walking speed is easily possible.

Credit where it's due, Yak Trax are outstanding.

Friday Rodent Blogging

So, having slept in his wheel, run on his wheel, and hidden in his wheel, Imo had decided to climb on his wheel. Why? To carefully test the dastardly human security for weak points, of course.

Freedom shall be mine, mark my words.

(in my head, Imo talks a lot like Stewie from Family Guy)


BBC America

Every so often I have to switch the cable over to BBC America, just to get a taste of home television. Granted, most of what I manage to see are old episodes of Are You Being Served?, but that's fantastic anyway.

The rare occasions when I hit Blackadder episodes are just birthday-like.

Rising petrol prices? What rising petrol prices?

I was rooting through my old picture files and I found this. It is the vehicle used by a fast food chain called "Chick-fil-a", a restaurant that serves chicken and uses cows as its spokespersons, which we've nicknamed "the cowtruck."

It's a Ford F-150 Super Duty, a meaty monster of a truck - as evidenced by its totally failed attempt to fit into a normal-sized parking space.

Eat mor chikin, indeed.

(correction: It's actually a Ford F-350 Super Duty)


Taxing times

All across America right now people are fighting their way through an annual ritual called Tax Time. At the beginning of the year Americans seek to find out whether the income tax they paid the previous year was the right amount, or if they owe more, or if the government owes them a refund.

It's made all the more complicated by the fact that income tax comes in two flavours - federal and state (and some places charge local taxes too) - and either, both, or neither may yield refunds or deficits.

Then you've got to figure your deductions, if any. Amongst many others are things like expenses related to searching for a job, charitable contributions, and the cost of cleaning any uniform your job requires.

Not only that, your income can cover things like lottery winnings or stock dividends, all of which must be taken into account.

Preparing your tax return on your own, for most people, is way too big a headache, so you pay an accounting firm to prepare it for you, which can cost a hundred or so dollars.

Okay, this year my refund amounts to about a grand after paying the accountants, but the hassle is amazing. And that's not like a kind of bonus, that's money I just overpaid throughout last year.

I never thought I'd say it, but I miss Her Majesty's Revenue and Customs department. They figured it all out for us. I miss having a tax code that pre-determines my tax level. I miss simply getting an end of year P60.

And, yeah, there was no end-of-year big refund, but there was no end-of-year big bill, either.


Well shut my mouth...

It seems like picking The Rolling Stones to do the halftime show at yesterday's Superbowl wasn't a safe enough bet, so the organisers censored some of the Stones' lyrics.

Story here.

Oh, and around 500 million people watched the first game of the last FIFA World Cup (2002 Korea/Japan) - and that's the first game, not the final. An estimated 89.6 million people watched last year's Superbowl.

Yes, the figures are estimates, and may not be 100% accurate, but when the opening game nets nearly six times the viewers, the figures don't need to be that accurate.


Superbowl XL: fulltime

Halftime show:

I'd guess that the controversy over Janet Jackson's "wardrobe malfunction" in Superbowl 38 reached even England, so it comes as no surprise that they played safe for 39, bringing in Paul McCartney, and this year we had The Rolling Stones.

No chance of a nipple slip there. Maybe a disc slip.

3rd Quarter:

Steelers 14-10 Seahawks.

This is looking bad for the Steelers.

On the commercial front, the ad of the year is the Bud Clydesdale horses commercial. Amazing.


Steelers 21-10 Seahawks.

Well, the Steelers plucked it out with an incredible trick play that put the game out of the Seahawks reach. Bill Cowher finally gets his Superbowl title and - if the rumours are true - Jerome Bettis (the Bus) retires this year winning a Superbowl in Detroit, his home town.

Emotional, heart-stopping, unbelievable.

At the presentation of the Vince Lombardi Trophy, The Bus announced that he is, indeed, retiring. What a way to go.

Superbowl XL: halftime


The game hasn't even started yet and I've already heard three claims that the Superbowl is "the most watched sporting event in the world."

I dunno about you, but I'd bet bits of my anatomy that I can name, off the top of my head, three events that draw more of a viewing crowd.

The Olympics.

The Winter Olympics.

And, oh, say, the FIFA World Cup Final (which, actually is the most watched sporting event in the world, drawing, I understand, almost a billion viewers every time).


The notion that an Americans-only sporting event could be watched by more people than an international sporting event could only be stated as a fact here in America. Everyone else would just laugh.

End of 1st quarter:

Seahawks are ahead 3-0.

So far the Steelers haven't impressed.

On the advert front, Bud is kicking arse with some hilarious commercials. Burger King shouldn't have bothered, their commercial sucked.


A brilliant run by Big Ben leaves the score Steelers 7-3 Seahawks, which is nice. However, with some controversy over whether Big Ben got in the end zone, if this game comes down to 7pts or less, we'll never hear the end of it.

The ad compo hasn't changed much, Bud is still in the lead, and Diet Pepsi have come out with a new slogan, "Brown and Bubbly" which, to me, sounds like a description of a cesspit. A late entry is Sprint, with the awesome "crime deterrent" spot (to deter crime, throw your phone point blank at people's heads - you really have to see it).

See you at fulltime.

Superbowl XL: pregame

I'm going to be blogging whilst watching the Superbowl today, from the comfort of my couch, feasting upon the Superbowl ... er ... feast prepared by the incomparable Mrs Doombreed.

Just an aside before the game starts:

I've noticed that the one Sunday of the year, which has been overtaken by something other than church, where there is partying and drinking and fun without fictional old men in the sky, that is not challenged nor decried on a regular basis by those who would seek to "keep Sunday for the Lord" and who preach such ridiculous epithets as "Jesus is the reason for the season" at Christmas, is Superbowl Sunday.

I wonder, in my sarcastic way, whether there is some connection between this all-American love of this one date in February and the fact that the various outspoken members of the religious right are almost silent on their usual rant.

The Republican party are in power right now because they appeal to so-called "middle America", and much has been made of the fact that "blue states" (states that are solidly Democrat Party voting) have higher average IQs, levels of education, income, quality of life, etc, than "red states" (states that are solidly Republican voting), which have higher levels of illiteracy and church attendance (and I'm not going to draw any conclusion whatsoever about those two points).

Annoying "middle America" by attacking the most American date in the most American sport would be political suicide. It seems that principles wither and die in the face of politics everywhere.

Anyway, all that aside, the game starts in an hour and a half or so, and I'm pulling for the Steelers.

And I'm especially looking forward to the real Superbowl competition - the Superbowl ad campaigns.

See you at halftime.

The 2006 State Of The Union Address...

...if it had been delivered by a pirate.

This is why they invented the internet.

Friday Rodent Blogging (belated)

Okay, I am in trouble. I was so messed up what with having two days off midweek, not to mention the migraine and the missed blogging, that I forgot yesterday was friday, and so, missed Friday Rodent Blogging.

Imo is not happy with me. He counts on his weekly exposure to the world in order to pass on messages to his devoted followers cunningly concealed in the form of different arrangements in his fur, specially shaped and placed pieces of cardboard, and a code key hidden in the way he holds his whiskers.

The Gerbil World Domination Plan has been set back a week. My sincerest apologies.


Spend Money Or You Don't Love Me Day (Feb 14th)

Valentine's Day is coming up, but I tend to dislike that kind of hallmark holiday, designed to make one buy cards and gifts. I prefer to celebrate the love I have for my wife, and the love she has for me, every day of the year. It cheapens it to only celebrate it one day.

My wife is the most wonderful woman on the planet - or in the universe. She is smart, beautiful, sexy, kind, loving, caring and considerate. I am the luckiest man in the world.

Even if you are propositioned by the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders, and spend the evening playing hide the salami in a vat of caramel and vanilla ice cream, before going on to judge a "most skillful cocksucker" contest, and then, whilst walking home, have a multi-million dollar winning lottery ticket blow into your face, I am still luckier than you. That's how wonderful Mrs Doombreed is.

I was the luckiest guy in the world the day I met her, and I just got luckier the day she agreed to marry me.

And I don't need it to be Valentine's Day to say it.

I love you, Mrs Doombreed, and I am happy beyond words that I have you to share my life with.*

*None of which, of course, means that Mrs Doombreed will miss out on Valentine's Day, where gifts, cards, and general, all-round treating-her-like-the-Empress-she-is will occur with almost sickening abandon.


That's a first

Well, I missed last night's blogging, a first for me. Still, that's what happens when you come down with a migraine and spend the night with your head down the loo. Mmmm... most pleasant.

So here is the blog I had already written to post last night:

My wife has a thing for board games, and in an effort to get some more "classic" games, she went to the local charity thrift store to see what was available second hand.

She bought a lot of games, but we were left with one burning question:

What kind of sadistic fuck gives a "Yahtzee" game to a charity store without a single fucking dice in the box?

Okay, I'm a gamer, so I have a ton of dice lying around, but that's not the point.



A lot of bull

Last night I saw the most outstanding video clip ever filmed anywhere in the world, ever, in the history of mankind, ever.

It was filmed at a bullfight in Spain. Now, I hate bullfighting. It isn't a sport. It's not fun to watch. Yeah, it's dangerous - but mainly for the bull. And it's just so enjoyable when the bull gets some payback.

Normally we would get to see the bull maybe lay a horn or a hoof on some luckless matador. Sometimes, the bull gets enough licks in to hospitalise one of his tormentors. And, yes, occasionally, someone gets killed (but any sympathy from me must be reserved for the bull, which always gets killed, and which has no choice in being there).

What happened in Spain yesterday was the ultimate in nature biting back.

An enraged bull - at this point, virtually unharmed - did what nobody thought possible - it vaulted the fence.

Oh yeah, that's right. Over a ton of extremely pissed off muscle with two great horns on the front, landed slap bang in the middle of the crowd that was baying for his blood.

Normally when you see an animal in this situation - surrounded by screaming, panicking humans - the animal starts to panic, too. Most of the injuries in this kind of situation come from the animal trying frantically to find a way out.

But not this time. This bull was pissed. He was charging around, trampling people, goring people, not making any effort to escape, just causing havoc.

Dozens of people were seriously injured. I'm not a believer in Karma, but it should be obvious that if they hadn't been there at this barbaric event, they wouldn't have been hurt, so I don't care.

The report ended with the note that the bull was later destroyed. But hey, he was going to be killed anyway, and was probably killed in a more humane way than the slow torture he was facing.

Which is why I love seeing one of these stories. I want to get a "go bull!" t-shirt, cap, and flag so I can sit on the couch and cheer for the animal.

Hell, this one was so awesome that I was tempted to leap to my feet and start a friggin' wave.